Saturday, April 4, 2009

Gallery Manners

Last night, I was quite excited as my close Goddess friend and colleague Schawn and husband Ryan Hardesty invited me to his art exhibit opening. Every few years, he shows his work at the Lorinda Knight Gallery, the most renowned gallery in Spokane, with this year’s theme entitled Continuous Field. Art is important to me, and while many galleries do not cater to the young eye and touch, I still feel it is important to expose my boys’ malleable minds to different ways of expression and craftmanship. I made the parental decision to bring them at five sharp before dropping them at their friends’ home so I could return to linger to my heart’s content.

“This is expensive art, and Ryan has put countless hours and effort into these pieces. Please approach them with respect and do not touch, but feel free to peer closely and formulate your own ideas about these landscapes,” I instructed them. As they quietly walked from painting to painting, the boys were beautiful, tolerating their mother who likes to stand in front of pieces, gaze into their interiors, become acquainted with their beings.

In addition to the main floor exhibit, the upstairs’ mezzanine hosts additional works of the featured artist. Paintings, photographs, and sculptures by other artists the gallery previously promoted line the shelves, lean against walls, and rest on the floor. Because Zachary and Alex’s behavior was exemplary downstairs, I assumed they would carry it with them upstairs like their Calvin & Hobbes books that they cart up and down the stairs in my house several times daily.

Soon after, however, their voices from the adjacent room penetrated my meditative contemplation like the sound of a prepubescent jackhammer.

Turning, I was horrified as I witnessed my boys fighting and fending off the villains of Star Wars with a metal sculptural piece, a triptych of guns.

At that moment, I understood that the three-gun piece beckons a boy in the exact way the overpowering smell of a new book lures me. After corralling them, downstairs we crept and said our cordial good-byes to the gallery owner.

(I am just hoping that Ms. Knight, during her rounds, doesn’t notice the misplacement of the triptych of guns, become suspicious, and check the sculpture for fingerprints. We’d be in trouble for sure.)

LL, 4/4/2009. Prevail.


  1. I'm laughing out loud! I love your boys already. Hope my next gallery visit is as exciting. Gallery turned battlefield, I like it. I'd love to see how they transform a shopping mall!

    By the way, I think you guys are spectacular parents.

  2. HAHAHAHA I bet the artist would have loved it--youknow with all that HDM and irony that accompanies anything "gun"...